132 - God, Vulnerability and Self-Disclosure
Here we are with Real Recovery Talk! Ben is hosting our show today with our guest Johnny, a recovered alcoholic and drug addict and part of the team at Futures Recovery Health Care in Jupiter, Florida.
Johnny grew up in a financially stable household and was a very privileged child, attended prep school, and expected people to always tell him he was brilliant. He graduated from college and landed a great job in Washington DC, making great money for his age at 21. He soon fell into cocaine addiction and was the life of the party until this came to an end when he became homeless.
He found himself out on the streets in Phoenix, Arizona. Johnny liked hanging out with people who were making fun of others because “we were better than them.” Out of control and in with the wrong crowd, “I realized I violated every type of value I had: physical, emotional, and sexual.” His life became a catch 22 of doing anything for money to get drugs, then needing to take drugs to forget about the action he had just received. This series of recurring events took Johnny to a place “where I had no hope.”
His distorted perception of body dysmorphia, along with the belief his parents instilled in having to be the best at both being an athlete and student, led him to have unrealistic standards for himself. Now, Johnny always needed to feel connected to a group. Looking back, he realized how much of a puppet he had become.
By August 16th, 2007, Johnny had been through five treatment centers and didn’t realize how much he was hurting his family, as well as himself. Johnny decidedly made a choice to not put a mind-altering substance in his body again.
Listen in to find out Johnny’s struggles with God, how he reconnected to God, and how Johnny continued to lie and struggle before he found a sponsor. Find out how his past actions when he was addicted caught up to him in the form of federal prison several years later. Learn how Johnny used this opportunity for 35 months to help other prisoners become sober and straight.
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Show Notes:
- [01:28] Johnny tells his story of how he fell into addiction.
- [05:06] You can’t outthink drug and alcohol addiction once addiction gets a hold of you.
- [05:28] Johnny talks about the void which drugs and alcohol filled for him.
- [08:14] August 15th, 2007, Johnny had been through five treatment centers
- [09:53] Johnny and his belief and disbelief in God.
- [11:35] Taking a look at sobriety and abstinence.
- [13:02] Johnny’s past catching up with him five years after his actions.
- [16:48] Looking at the impact of drug and alcohol abuse on family and others around you.
- [17:57] Patrick, a counselor in Lima, PA, helped Johnny unload his fears and move through the process of healing.
- [19:30] Brene Brown and the courage to be vulnerable.
- [21:29] Sharing and the role of sharing in the process of healing and relations theory.
- [23:00] Three types of recovery programs at Futures Recovery Healthcare Center.
- [27:40] Working with people who cannot show weakness.
- [31:02] The experiential process, hands on, working with recovering addicts one-on-one.
- [34:30] Johnny’s daily thinking process and mindset as he moves through daily life.
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- Brene Brown and Vulnerability
- Futures Recovery Healthcare Center